Coaches & Leadership
If you ask athletes what they need from their coaches, you’ll get a list that sounds reasonable. Clear expectations. Honest feedback. Consistent standards. Playing time that reflects their effort.
That list isn’t wrong. But it’s incomplete. And what’s missing from it is the thing that makes everything else on the list actually work.
Read this passage slowly.
Just as a nursing mother cares for her children, so we cared for you. Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well.
1 Thessalonians 2:7–8 — NIVLet that sit for a second before you move.
Our lives as well. Paul isn’t describing a transactional relationship. He’s describing investment. The willingness to share not just information or instruction but something of himself. That’s what genuine care looks like in a leadership relationship.
Athletes need to know that their coach actually sees them. Not their performance — them. The research on coaching effectiveness is consistent on this point: the coaches who get the most out of athletes over time are almost always the ones who have genuine relationships with their players as people, not just as performers.
That doesn’t mean blurring the professional boundary. It means knowing enough about who your athletes are outside the sport to coach them as whole people. It means caring about what happens to them after the season ends, not just whether they produced the right results while they were in your program. It means being willing to share enough of your own humanity — your struggles, your failures, your own story — to give your athletes permission to bring theirs.
The athlete who knows their coach cares about them as a person will run through a wall for that coach. The athlete who only experiences their coach as a performance evaluator will perform to the standard and no further.
What do your athletes need from you? Your investment. Your presence. Your life, as well as your coaching.
The athlete who knows their coach cares about them as a person will run through a wall. The one who only experiences a performance evaluator will perform to the standard and no further.
Do the athletes you coach know that you care about who they are, not just how they perform? What’s the evidence of that? What’s missing?
Self-assessment of the actual quality of the coaching relationship. Honest answers are more valuable than reassuring ones.
Share your coaching. And share your life, as well. That’s what produces the trust that produces everything else.
This devotional invites coaches into honest self-assessment of their relationships with athletes. It works best in a small group of coaches or as a private reflection.