When Someone Leaves

Somebody in this room is gone.

Maybe by their choice. Maybe by the program’s. Maybe the circumstances are complicated and not everyone in this room knows the full story.

Whatever the specifics, the fact is: the team that shows up to practice tomorrow is different from the team that was here last week. And that deserves to be acknowledged before we just move on.

Read this passage slowly.

Let that sit for a second before you move.

To lay down one’s life for one’s friends. The ultimate investment in another person. Jesus is describing the full measure of love — the willingness to give everything for the sake of the people who matter to you.

A teammate leaving the program is a loss. The specific weight of it depends on the circumstances, the relationship, and what the person meant to the team. But it is always a loss of something — even when the departure was necessary, even when the relationship was complicated, even when the team is better positioned without them.

The team has a few choices in how to respond. The first is to move on quickly — to fill the gap, adjust the roles, and not dwell on the departure. That’s sometimes the right call practically. It’s almost never right emotionally. The people who competed alongside the one who left need to process the departure before they can fully engage with what comes next.

The second is to name it honestly — to acknowledge what was lost, to allow the people most affected to feel it, and to carry the person with the right combination of honesty about the situation and genuine care for them as a person regardless of how or why they left.

The departure happened. Name it. Feel what’s true about it. Then take care of each other.

Focuses on the person rather than the circumstances. The tribute is more valuable than the analysis.